I Want to Hurt Spammers

If only I could have 10 minutes, a bat, and a room full of people who send me spam. I don't know these people and I have never met them but for some reason they have decided that my package is too small or that I must sign up for all sorts of porn in my inbox. Lesson one in sales: Don't tell prospective client that they have a tiny dick. Just a suggestion. Oh well then, "perfect match" is having a communication weekend. Unless this weekend involves watching hockey and getting pissed they can piss off. My money and I have an understanding. If it trys to leave me for some crap ass product I'll make sure no man will ever want it again. i.e. From now on I'm using every twenty dollar bill as a hanky. According some some of my spam I can also increase my bust size. This is getting kinkily out of hand. But I'm a little busy right now with all the free vacations and shopping sprees I've won in the past few days. Assholes.