Time to Hit the Old Dusty Trail

Well, it's about that time again. Time to find a new job. I've been a driver now for over a year. Longest job I've had. Friday afternoon I was informed that starting Monday, I will be required to stay out until all my deliveries are finished. That means that if people in the warehouse dick around and take too long to load the van on a busy day, I have to continue with my deliveries regardless of how long it takes. So when I get back, everyone has gone home and I get the shaft. That's how the old guy there does it so that's how I should have to do it. Uh, blow me. So I've got my résumé updated and I'm applying for jobs this weekend. There's only so much crap I'm will to deal with before I give the old one finger salute. I want a job were I can go home and forget about it at a decent hour. So far I've applied at a candle factory and a North End florist's shop. So if anyone knows of a job that doesn't involve holding a shovel and walking behind an elephant, give me a heads up. The sooner the better, before I go postal.

Griggs County Chainsaw Massacre

Gather 'round children and listen to my epic tale. It was about Easter time in '07. I decided to go on a mystical journey south to the Dakota Territory. I stayed on a farm in Griggs County south of Aneta. I petted a cow or two. Also a friendly bull. No horns though. I also played with a Pomeranian dog. It was a good guard dog. My cousin and her husband live on the farm and raise cattle. I let the cows know that given the opportunity I would make them all into steak. They were unimpressed. I also informed a young calf that he had a stupid looking face. He knew what was good for him and kept his mouth shut.
Saturday morning I journeyed to Grand Forks. At the Ponderosa Steakhouse my keys became locked inside my fancy automobile. In MacGyver-esqe fashion, I used a prybar, a tent pole, a tent peg, and a strip of duct tape to gain entry once again. Then, I went Mayville and saw many more relatives there. I discovered that bargain brand diet soda is crap. Also another discovery I made was that there is no two-four of Busch. Only a 30 pack for $17US. Here a 15 costs me $21CDN. At those prices how could I afford not to be drunk. Booya!
Going to the US and going to Canada are two polar opposite experiences. Going south I get searched every time. They ask the same questions. I have to sit in the same waiting room. Entering Canada I alway go through one of the smaller crossings. "Yes,I spent some money, no, I have no guns, yes, I bought some booze. I live in Winnipeg. I'm a Canadian citizen." And back on the road. Two minutes tops. Boy do I love Canada's pathetic security. Until I get blown up by terrorists, but for now...
In conclusion, farms have so much cool junk.